Save the Ta-ta’s

modesty

You may think this is an article about self breast exams and mammograms.  And while those are important for breast cancer prevention, that’s not what I’m fired up about today.

I’m often stunned by girls feeling the need to share their girls with other people.  It seems to scream, “Hey, look at me, I need attention.  I need to be noticed.”

This trend is just as epidemic among married women as it is with singles.   I don’t want to attempt to determine why we feel the need to play show and tell with our ta-ta’s.  All I know is it’s not necessary to share with everyone to be sexy.

Men love them, I know.

So if you’re married, save yours for your man.  The men at work, in the grocery store, walking down the street, or at church really do not need to sneak a peek at your cleavage.

If you’re single, may I suggest you will get more respectful interest from the type of guy you would probably want to keep, if you would cover yourself.  You can still be sexy and cover the girls.  For purity’s sake, save your ta-ta’s for your future husband.  He deserves it.

The world says if we’ve got it, we should flaunt it.  To choose to dress with some class and modesty goes completely against cultural norms.  And if we do, we will face criticism for it.

I wrote an article a few months ago called, Girls and Their Girls: too much of a good thing.  This article was posted by a website called Is This Modest?  From this, I received a couple of the nastiest comments ever in all my years of writing.  One angry reader at Is This Modest wrote…

Cleavage does NOT scream insecurity. Feeling your cheeks go hot with embarrassment upon seeing part of another woman’s breasts screams insecurity. Writing an article about the way OTHER women choose to dress themselves screams insecurity. Asserting that women who dress in a way of which you don’t approve are “hated by other women” screams insecurity. Assuming that your relationship with your god is contingent on the amount of skin you show and trying to convince other women of that absolutely screams insecurity.

I responded…

I’m glad you happened on this article.  Obviously what I’ve written has upset you.  Though I was making no direct attack at you, apparently you felt I was.  This is a bold statement you’re making about my security, or lack thereof, without knowing me personally:)  I realize not everyone is going to agree or believe what I believe.  I’m approving this comment, because we’ve all been given a right to choose what to believe and how we will treat people who believe differently. Thank you for taking the time to comment.  Feel free to visit my website any time.

Respectfully and in all sincerity,

Rivera Douthit

I share this to say, sometimes we have to decide where we stand and stand firm on it, regardless of what the world says.

Truth is, if you stand up for modesty and purity and the things of God, you WILL be attacked.  You will be ridiculed and persecuted sometimes.  And guess what!  God sees it all!  He understands.  He’s been there.  Do you think Jesus was never persecuted?  Think again.

So save your ta-ta’s for your husband alone, even if the world tells you otherwise.  God will honor your courage to take a stand!

18 thoughts on “Save the Ta-ta’s

  1. Reiko Wright says:

    Love your honesty and courage responding to someone who disagrees with you. You affirmed her right to her belief in a loving non-judgemental way while also refusing to apologize for your beliefs. Acceptance vs Political correctness. What a great example.

    1. Rivera Douthit says:

      Thank you Reiko. Honestly, I had to pause for two days, pray, let it marinate, and let God filter my answer. My immediate response would not have been as grace[full]. 🙂 Holy Spirit’s filter is invaluable!

  2. laurabennet says:

    Once again a timely and wonderful post! Persecution is a reality if we stand for purity and situations that are in everyone’s best interests even if everyone doesn’t agree. Our family is struggling with that in some other areas right now so I thank you for the encouragement to stand and the example of graciously speaking the truth in love.

  3. Jan Meek #JaniceKMeek says:

    God’s Word is offensive. People preaching and teaching God’s True Word is offensive. It is because God’s Word tells us that the lifestyle that we are living is wrong and we need to make changes. Obviously this person needs to make some changes in her life and you have offended her. I say, way to go and congratulations. If we keep telling others that what they are doing is ok and God still loves them no matter what (and He does, don’t get me wrong) then we are not doing God’s will. They will never see that they need to make changes in their lives. They need to repent and that means to totally turn from their sin, go in the opposite direction and go straight into God’s arms. The direction that they are headed right now is in the opposite direction and one day God will say “I never knew you, depart from Me”

    1. Rivera Douthit says:

      Yes, people often are offended by the truth of God’s word. However, it’s never my intention to offend. I’ve found if we speak the truth in love, the Holy Spirit is faithful to do the convicting! But, I couldn’t agree w you more, people need to repent. We all need to:)

      1. lifeofaministermom says:

        This is so true! I also agree that your response to this women’s comment is a great lesson in itself, as it’s a great example of how to respond to those who WILL persecute us. I’ve learned something here and I appreciate you for sharing as you stand bold for Him!

  4. Pamela Healy Nogueira says:

    Girlfriend, I love the way you responded to the unhappy reader! Perhaps she is young and doesn’t yet have full understanding of the world. In any case, she was led to your blog!!! That is worth all of the criticism!!! Keep fighting the good fight…you’re doing your Father proud!!! ❤

  5. restingintheword says:

    You handled that very gracefully – my viewpoint is the same as yours, and my motives often fall on the deaf ears of some friends, who also think I’m insecure or overly-fanatic about religious modesty…. Or whatever they call it. It really drives me nuts when I see my husband tempted too – he does have issue keeping his eyes focused on the neck up, and sometimes I’d like to tell my friends “hey! Button up!!” Not because I’m insecure, but because he can’t keep away from it long enough to find a cure for his googling eyes. It makes me uncomfortable, and I wonder what he’s thinking, though I may truly never know. I like to think I’m doing my friends a favor by dressing more modestly if I know that their spouse will be around. Then I apply that same rule at the mall or library or church, spare my sisters the argument they may have wth their spouse later, if I don’t needlessly flaunt what should be private IMO 🙂

  6. Mary says:

    Rivera,

    May God’s sweet Holy Spirit continue to give you strength and courage to speak His Truth in love! May He also protect you from those who would sling arrows of anger, hate or confusion as you endeavor to inspire others to follow His ways! As the Bible says: “Do not lean to the right or to the left. Walk away from evil.” (Proverbs 4:27, God’s Word Translation, 1995)

    P.S. I think Rebecca has a very good point in her response, and I pray that women will pause to ponder and pray about this as well!

  7. RebeccaAarup says:

    Hi Rivera, you know I completely agree with this (it’s not as much of a temptation when you’re not so well endowed lol) but I am curious if perhaps you could address this issue as it pertains to bathing suits. I know a lot of Christians, in fact nearly all of them, who dress modestly but wear bikinis in the pool. I don’t understand that at all. It’s one of the reasons I hate going to the beach or swimming in the summer b/c I don’t care to see it. Maybe that makes me insecure but I’ve always wondered how the modesty issue gets tossed aside at the pool.

    1. Jan Meek says:

      I agree with you. But even shopping for bathing suits is horrible. I wear a one piece with shorts over it. Seems like most swimsuits, even one-pieces try to go as high as they can and as low as they can.

    2. Rivera Douthit says:

      Hi Rebecca! Thanks for stopping by. I guess I didn’t even think to include the pool or beach dress code. I always think, “Well I guess there’s a time and a place for everything, including sun bathing.” I know people do get a bit carried away, showing up with no more than strings and triangles. I appreciate this thought, and it’s certainly one to ponder. I also think we as women need to be confident with the bodies God’s given us, no matter our size or shape. I love to sun bath, but I think it can be as simple as how you wear your sunbathing attire. Some two piece bathing suits cover more than others. Some with tankinis actually cover more than some one piece suits. I’m not going to tell women they shouldn’t wear a two-piece. BUT… Are we out flaunting our bodies? Are we wearing a cover until time to lay in the sun? I think the big thing we have to ask ourselves is WHAT ARE OUR MOTIVES? Are we merely sunbathing, being as nonconspicuous as possible, or are we showing off and desiring attention? I guess each person has to self examine in this case.
      Great point:)

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